Really? Has it been that long?
I've been having more 'up' days than 'down' days lately.
I took our anniversary off from work and spend some time at her grave. That was a pretty tough day. There is constantly so much that I want to share with her. So many tough challenges and good results at work, so many little things the kids do, just the smell of springtime.... I found myself describing how good naps feel on rainy days to Sid this past weekend... how mama and I used to take naps on rainy weekend days. So many things I miss...
Sid is a sweet as ever... she can do so many things by herself now... but I still get random "I love you daddy's"... that just melt my heart. I told her that her smile lights up my world ... and she gives me this sweet, bright , smile... and boy does it ever. She is almost done with her first year in pre-school. At home we are teaching her fun things like letter sounds, sounding out words, rhyming, alliteration, and addition. She is getting really good at writing "S"'s. I'm hoping that she'll sign my fathers day card all by herself this year. She's such a big girl ... and such a sweetie.
Bek is miss smiley... even at 3am. She is running and talking up a storm. If I could just get a translator so that I could understand it. She has a few words: hi, ball, puppy, Sidney, gmama ... it is so neat to hear her voice. She is working on her molars ... and she is eating a bunch of solid foods. She is pretty much all smiles - unless she is complaining about dinner and smearing food in her hair. She folds her hands for prayers before eating and she tries to say "Alleluia"...
I'd love to see Hyatt marveling at her two babies. That is probably when it hits me the most - she put so much love into Sid and Bek she'd be so proud of them...
Go kiss your kids, and tell them how special they are... go hug your lover and tell them how much they mean to you. It's been too long ...
Troy.
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I (Troy's brother Pete) have opened this site to provide updates for friends and family on Hyatt's condition. As a warning, there will be explicit details on her condition and some posts may not be for the feint of heart. Troy has asked that I do this, so that someday (soon!) Hyatt can read the details of exactly what happened.
Mary-Hyatt F. Nolan
33 comments:
Still here with you and your in my prayers. You don't know me, but I've followed your story and blog from the beginning through my cousin in law Margaret Asbell. Just want you to know that you are not forgotten.
It is so good to read your update...so good. So wonderful to read about your daughters. We continue to pray for you. God Bless!
Troy,
Thanks for posting. I think of your family often, especially your girls. Still praying for you and still counting all my blessings and trying not to take life too seriously. Thank you for that.
Sam
Hi Troy,
You seem to be handling things well. You have a strong support group, you're smart and well grounded, and I'm sure that you'll find someone to share your life with in the future. Whenever I hear of something extremely serious happening to a friend of mine, I have difficulty actually believing that such horrible things can happen to people I know. But of course these kinds of things happen to all kinds of people. Some people find a way to reclaim the joys life offers. They are the winners. You have a winning personality and I'm confident that you will travel that path as well. Best wishes for that to happen soon.
Darryl
I am happy to hear that you are having some good days. I am sure that Hyatt would be very proud of the way you are taking care of the girls.
Hang in there and continue to be strong.
Becky Lowe
It does seem impossible that it has been 5 months Troy, but I am so glad to know that the "up" days are starting to outnumber the "down" days. It sounds like you are grieving and healing and, even without having ever met Hyatt, I believe that is what she would want for you and the girls. You'll have her with you always in your sweet babies. Know that people are still praying and thinking of you all.
Troy, I'm glad you're starting to have some "up days". It'll get easier, but it'll never go away. You're blessed to have 2 sweet little reminders of Hyatt.
Take care,
Christie
I am glad to see you all are doing ok, and learning to live a "new" normal life.
I check the blog daily in hopes of updates to see how you all are doing.
You are still in my thoughts and prayers everyday.
Tracy
Love you and ALWAYS sending (((Hugs))), thoughts and prayers over the fence!!
We miss her too and we are sooo incredibly PROUD of you and your sweet parents!
Drinks soon....
Margaret, Rich, Lindsey & Jamie Asbell
We check your log regularly and we were so happy to see the update. I am glad you have had some up days and will continue to pray that they come more often. Your girls sound like they are getting so big! God Bless you and your family always-
Carol (HBPK)
Thank you for sharing your beautiful family with us. You and your loved ones are continually being lifted up in prayer.
You don't know me, but I have kept up with your blog from the beginning. So glad to see an update.
I read somewhere that it is not time that heals, but what you do with the time! Sounds like Hyatt would be very proud of you. I know this is a very tough day for you and your girls. Continue to be thankful for the gift of Hyatt and your girls.
I am not dead, I have only become inhuman:
That is to say,
Undressed myself of laughable prides and infirmities,
I admired the beauty
While I was human, now I am part of the beauty.
I wander in the air,
Being mostly gas and water, and flow in the ocean;
Touch you and Asia
At the same moment; have a hand in the sunrises
And the glow of this grass.
I left the light precipitate of ashes to earth
For a love-token.
(Robinson Jeffers)
We are continuing to pray for you and your family. We certainly wish you lots of "up" days to come.
After a bumpy start on Mother's day morning, seeing you and your family in church made the day. The girls are simply adorable and at such a wonderful age. It must have been a tough day for you again. I am so sorry!
For us, it brought into perspective what really matters. As many times before you were an inspiration to me. Thank you!
Ursula
Troy, thank you so much for the update. I often still think of you and your girls and how you are doing. Please keep posting.
Troy-
Your grief may always be present but the special memories will carry you through the hard times.
You are a very strong man with a heart of gold and I am so proud of how you are handling this all!
I know Hyatt sees and hears and knows whatspecial precious gems she has, Sid-Bek and of course you and she is now your guardian angel who will guide you and inspire you throughout the steps of the rest of your life.
Even though I was just your realtor, I felt you all were an amazing couple with hearts of gold and if there is ever anything I can do for you all, never hesitate to ask!
Much love to you and the girls!
Sarah Frick Armstrong
Hey Troy, Still praying for you and the girls. Glad to hear that you are having some good days. You are loved and not alone.
Can't remember how I came across your blog, it was heartbreaking to read and I'm so sorry you are going through this. I think about you and your two little girls often.
Your writing has had an incredible impact on my husband's and my relationship, while it's always been good we became complacent in our time spent with each other. Now, every day, several times a day in fact, we tell each other how much we love one another and focus on being in the moment. Thank you!
Hello Troy,
Time is a truly a healer. The hurt may go away, but the memories will live on forever in you, Sid and Bec. If you get a chance, email me (chris.myers@sanmina-sci.com). It has been way too long. Talk later.
Your long time and somewhat long ago friend, Chris.
Still looking in on you. I hope your spirits are lifting. I heard a country song the other day by Alan Jackson....I don't know the name of it....but it has the words..."She flew up to heaven on the wings of angels...." Everytime I hear it....I think of you and your beautiful family. You don't know me.....but I will always think of you and pray for you and your family.
Troy,
I have a feeling that wherever she is, Hyatt is marveling at her babies...and also at her true love, her parents and in-laws, friends, and all of the strangers who have rallied to support your family over the last five months.
You continue to be in our thoughts and prayers...we'll send up more prayers for more "up days."
Sharing your story makes a difference.
Hang in there.
Hey Troy,
I was thinking of you and the girls today as the sun was shining. I wondered if maybe you were taking them to the park or the pool and missing Hyatt doing those things with you. I'm still praying as God brings you to mind and trusting the one who is the God of all comfort to be exactly that for you. You are loved.GarvyS
Troy, just thinking about you and praying for you today. May you experience His grace and peace as you navigate through the remainder of your day. You are loved, GarvyS
Troy,
I'm praying for you today - I think you're at 7 months today and I'm at 2 years. It's not fun, life goes on and we have to too.
Matt
Hi Troy,
Happy Father's Day. No matter what, you will always be "father". God bless you all today and every day.
Love, Bob and Pat Geipel
Troy,
Happy Belated Fathers Day! I'm sure it was bittersweet, experiencing it without Hyatt...But I know she'd be proud of you: your strength, your courage, but most of all your faith and inspiration through all of this. You probably won't ever fully comprehend how your faith-filled response to this tragedy has positively affected others. I pray for you and your family often.
Some days its still so hard for me to comprehend that she's gone. Since I'm so far away, I didnt' get to see and talk to her everyday, and sometimes, months would go by between our long chats. In some ways that's been a mixed blessing, as at times I find myself wanting to share a success or joy in my life....I've actually picked up the phone to dial a few times before realizing what I was doing. She is greatly missed.
Rhonda Rollins
"Sissy's Song" by Alan Jackson....I like to think of it as "Hyatt's Song."
I hope you are doing well...
Just thinking about you and your family today and wondering how things were going. Hope you and your girls will enjoy summer.
Thinking of you today and still praying for you and the girls as well as the rest of your family! Love and Hugs, GarvyS
Troy,
I still think of, and pray for, you and the girls. Would love to hear how you are doing. There may be a time for you to move past this blog . . . and that's okay. If you feel up to it, though, it would be good to hear from you. You continue to be in the thoughts and prayers of so many people. All the best.
M.M.
Hey Troy,
I hope you enjoying some well deserved vacation time this summer. I'm still praying for you as God brings you to mind. You are loved, GarvyS
Troy, I just learned about Hyatt from John Bumgarner and am so sorry for your loss. She was wonderful. I remember the fun we all had at NCSU w/ Scholars Council. I live quite near you in Stafford and would love to see you again and meet your sweet girls. Again, my condolences.
Laura Pate Rodier
Troy and family,
Keep looking for an update while we continue thinking and praying for you, the girls, and all your family. Hope you can take advantage of the summertime pleasures and continue to heal. Love, Bob and Pat Geipel
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